Well Here I stand with 12 months past,
I'll tell you, time- it goes by fast.
To this green state we each were brought,
not just to teach but to be taught.
And as I've filled my NC post,
I've truly learnt what matters most
I caught a plane and traveled far,
and learned "state-side" was just as hard!
I knew the basics; short and sweet.
But after milk must come the meat!
He chastens whom he loves I guess,
Sometimes I wished he'd love me less!
'Cuz by and by (it was quite strange)
the folks I met began to change,
while I remained still quite the same,
I wondered why I even came.
My prayers at night got short and gruff,
"Oh Lord, when will it be enough?
"I've given all that I could give;
The ones I loved, the life I lived.
Yet here I am, not changed one whit,
I'm grumpy, tired, and want to quit.
If those I meet can grow and learn,
when's it enough? When's it my turn?"
And then a whisper crossed the veil,
"You gave me much, but not you will,
Though you may act and look the part,
you're still a gentile in your heart.
Change isn't what you want to do,
does that sound like "enough" to you?"
So here is it, here's what I learned:
As far as changing is concerned,
while we can change, be "born again"
we won't be forced to be like him.
If we would be baptized by fire,
what matters most is our desire.
Remember that they heard Him ask,
"Oh Father, would this cup might pass?"
On that dark night He could have run,
He could have said, "My will be done."
But He Himself gave his will up,
and shrugged and drank the bitter cup.
He gave His heart and now I see,
that's His example, set for me.
Because of Christ we can be cleansed,
freed from death, and from our sins,
But giv'n to man's the pow'r to choose,
and choosing life is up to you.
A midst the time 'tween birth and grave,
there's really just one soul we save,
and that's our own. We set the pace,
that we will run in life's great race.
See, we're the ones who have to say,
"O Lord, I'll walk thy chosen way."
So someday when my life is through,
and I've done "all that I could do,"
I'll meet my God near Lehi's tree,
and there we'll stand, just him and me,
He'll ask me what on earth I've done,
to be a "good and faithful" one.
I hope I'll boldly stand to face,
the one who gave me of his grace,
Because I did what I should do,
and did it 'cuz "I wanted to."
That hope's my humble prayer 'til then,
in Jesus' Sacred name, Amen.
